We at Energize Ministries desire to come alongside Pastors’ Wives-recognizing the unique role that God has called them to fulfill. We want to support and encourage them by being their friend, by providing safe places for them to share, by offering a listening ear, and by helping to connect them with other pastors’ wives who understand what ministry life is all about.
Philippians 4:14 says, “It was a beautiful thing that you came alongside me…”
Pastor’s Wife Support
Charlotte’s role at Energize Ministries is to provide support for our pastors’ wives. Charlotte has been involved in mentoring for many years and currently serves as a leader in her church’s mentoring ministry. She served four years as a caregiver in the Stephens Ministry program where she met her husband. Her passion is to serve women, inspiring and encouraging them so they realize that they are never alone. We serve a God rich in mercy, and his great love is never withheld from us.
In 2019, she went on a mission trip to the UBTS Baptist Seminary in L’viv, Ukraine, where she taught, encouraged, and mentored women pursing degrees in ministry. It was this experience that opened up her eyes and created in her a desire to do more for God in her retirement years. God was working in her heart and stirring the desire for something new – something that used her gifts to glorify Him. She is excited about connecting Pastors’ wives so that they can come alongside one other in prayer and encouragement; not only sharing in each other’s joys and blessings, but also in life’s challenges.
Charlotte is married to Stephen, who is serving as the North America Mission’s Coordinator for International Commission. Together they have three daughters and four grandchildren. She loves traveling with her husband, being outdoors, gardening, and playing golf with friends. In her spare time, she loves to read, write, and work on various projects.
Our Next Coffee Connections
Coffee Connections is a time where pastor’s wives can come together to connect with other pastor’s wives in a safe space. This is a place where they can take off their “Pastor’s Wife” hat and just be themselves, making friendships with other godly women who understand and know the journey. New dates coming soon.
Annual Pastors’ Wives Brunches
Each year we host a number of Pastors’ Wives Brunches. This a time for pastor’s wives to come out and enjoy themselves. This event is designed to honor them and let them know that we see them and want them to understand that all they do, often behind the scenes is appreciated. This event is one where they can just come to enjoy themselves and not have to be in charge or responsible for the set up or clean up or the 101 other things that go into hosting an event. We want them to feel “PRICELESS” just the way their Savior sees them.
NOT SEEN, BUT WATCHED
A pastor’s wife recently shared how she was overwhelmed with all the jobs and responsibilities she had in her role as a pastor’s wife. She said, “I don’t feel ‘seen’ and yet I know I’m always ‘watched’”. She then added, “Does that make any sense?”
Yes, her description makes total sense to anyone who’s been in ministry. It also beautifully describes the unique and often forgotten position many pastor’s wives find themselves in.
How about your pastor’s wife? Do you really “see” her and make sure she is “seen” and appreciated for all she does, often behind the scenes and often without pay.
Do you make sure she doesn’t feel “watched” and talked about for what she does or doesn’t do or how her children behave?
You can #betheone who can change this pastor’s wife’s words from “not seen” and “watched” to “loved” and “appreciated.”
THE HURTING PASTOR’S WIFE
I recently came across this post from weary, hurting pastor’s wife. She shared-“Today I gladly hand in my ‘Pastor’s Wife’ title…a church member came up to me after a Bible study to tell me how inconsiderate I had been and how I had hurt someone’s feelings. The Sunday she was referencing, I had had a sinus infection along with a migraine headache and had barely made it through the service. I then went home to sleep through the next two days. I do not even remember much from that service, but I’m being reprimanded because I didn’t do whatever she thought I should have or should not have done and I’m just tired!”
Maybe you are a pastor’s wife who has been in this exact same spot, or maybe you are a church member who never thought about all the pressures a pastor’s wife faces trying to please and meet the expectations of so many people. Some days are just hard, and we all need to give grace to each other.
Next time are tempted to criticize your Pastor’s Wife, can you take a minute and try to imagine what it is like to walk in her shoes and to live in a glass house with so many named and unnamed expectations? Can you instead of sharing something negative, take that opportunity to #betheone to write her a thank note and show her what it is like to be encouraged, supported, and loved? Maybe God could use you to allow her to happily reclaim her “Pastor’s Wife” title.
“Sometimes you have to let go of the picture you thought life would be and learn to find joy in the life you are living.” That quote really hit home to me. Three years ago, I became a widow. It’s not the life I had imagined when I married my high school sweetheart and pastor husband. I thought we would grow old together and retire doing mission work and traveling cross country in an RV helping churches. But life does not always give us what we had hoped for or envisioned.
I know most pastors don’t end up with the problem-free church of their seminary dreams. Believe me, problem free churches do not exist! If you are a pastor or a pastor’s wife though, we are here to help you keep the JOY when those problems do arise. Joy in the life you’ve been called to, and in the relationships, you’ve been given. Learning this can be hard work- for all of us, but it is a choice we need to make EVERY day. If we can train our minds to focus on the joys and blessings in our life-they are there, if you will look for them-instead of the problems—which are so easy to spot; we can, like Paul begin to say that we have learned in whatever state we are, to be content and to even find JOY!